Naughty Nikki
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INTERVIEW WITH LESLIE LANGTRY, DEBUT AUTHOR, FUNNY LADY
The Realm: You’re married to a bodyguard, have tons of books on assassins in your home, and you’ve published your first book, which has a heroine assassin who falls in love with a bodyguard. Now tell us, really, did you meet your husband while you were trying to assassinate one of his clients? What’s it like being married to a man with that job?
Leslie: That’s really funny! No, I didn’t meet him while targeting one of his clients. He was actually in the 82nd Airborne when I met him – this was before the bodyguard “salad days.” He started doing that, oh, back in ’93 or ’94. Being married to him is great. I’ve been able to embarrass myself in front of everyone from Clinton and Gorbachev to John Walsh of “America’s Most Wanted” (not my fault entirely – too much booze and not enough food. I blame Tom). I get to use his extensive library on assassination and we’re apparently great fun at parties. One time this couple was telling us how they role-play as the overworked, hassled teacher and the underpaid journalist. We got to say we play the romance writer and the bodyguard every night.
The Realm: ‘SCUSE ME WHILE I KILL THIS GUY. GUNS WILL KEEP US TOGETHER. Now those are very catchy titles that haven’t been done to death. They’re effective enough that in a room with thousands of people, I spotted your sexy fun cover and catchy title, and just had to buy the book. How did you come up with them?
Leslie: To be honest, I was kind of joking with ‘SCUSE ME. I’d sent a list of titles to my fabulous editor (because my working title, DEATH IN THE FAMILY wasn’t wacky enough) and at the last second – for a joke – added ‘SCUSE ME WHILE I KILL THIS GUY. (Okay – a little alcohol was involved.) To my utter surprise, that’s the one she liked. I was thrilled! I love how it fits in with the double entendre of The Greatest Hits Series, and I’m a fan of mangled song lyrics. Well, mainly that’s because I’m the one who usually gets them wrong. My editor came up with the second title and I’m currently working on the third. And it’s hard. Harder than I ever imagined. I painted myself into that corner, didn’t I?
The Realm: What is your writing process once you have a book idea in mind? Are you a plotter? Do you take it as it comes? Do you spend a lot of time brainstorming? How do your ideas come to you?
Leslie: I start with page one and take it from there. I never know what’s going to happen until I write it. For some reason, if I plot out the whole book before writing it – I get bored and no longer want to write it. I guess I need to be entertained too. Weird process, huh? My ideas come to me in strange ways. I was actually working on another book when this one came to me in a dream. Gin Bombay wouldn’t shut up until I put the other book aside – and believe me – she had some great stuff. I don’t really brainstorm. My brain just keeps a lot from me until it is sure I’m ready to deal with it. How’s that for schizophrenic?
The Realm: What is your favorite thing about being a writer? Which part of the story is your favorite part to write? And which is your least favorite?
Leslie: My favorite thing about being a writer is making stuff up and making people laugh. I love, love, love it when people tell me they loved the book – just like you did! I’m having so much fun with it and I’m making a lot of friends – which is cool! You bought the book from me in Dallas and wrote me that you liked it and now we e-mail each other all the time. How cool to find that there are other people out there who are just as strange as me! My favorite part to write is the beginning. My least favorite part is the end. By the end of the book I start second-guessing everything and drive myself crazy. But when starting a new book – anything goes and I feel like I have a lot more freedom.
The Realm: Romance writers have an uphill struggle to overcome negative viewpoints. When you’re writing a story, what do you hope your readers will take away from it?
Leslie: Isn’t that stupid? Virtually every song on the radio, every movie, every book has an element of romance or love story in it. Hell, even Shoot Em Up and 300 – both pegged as braw guy flicks had a central love story that was crucial to the theme! People just need to wake up. When I’m writing a story, I hope readers will have fun with it and be entertained. I read to escape. I hardly ever read what is called “literary fiction” any more because it’s too damned depressing. I want to laugh, be surprised and maybe cry a little but when the book is done I want to be able to say, “That book was great! I can’t wait for the next one!”
The Realm: Was there any one person or event that inspired you to start writing? How did you keep going through the “passes”?
Leslie: I’ve wanted to write since the second grade. Why I put it off for so long is beyond me. There are some authors who make me laugh so hard I want to write as well as they do. I love Hugh Laurie’s The Gunseller and anything by J. Maarten Troost, Julie Kenner, Katie MacAlister, Joan Hess’ Maggody series kills me. I’m discovering new writers too, like Michelle Bardsley, Melanie Lynne Hauser and Jasper Fforde.
I didn’t really have any passes on this book – but I did on the three books I wrote before this one. It didn’t bother me too much because I could see that I was learning something from each manuscript and I had so many ideas I could move on to the next thing easily. I think people put too much hope into their first book and keep messing with it, instead of doing something new. My first book was a disaster. If I’d kept working on it instead of moving on, I’d probably be bitter and depressed because it would never sell. It was that bad. But I learned about dialogue in that book (and I learned that while I love to read historical – I can’t write it worth a damn).
The Realm: Speaking of “passes”, you told me once that you received a not so nice one on the same day that you got the call from Dorchester wanting to buy your book. Can you tell us about that, and how it made you feel? Do you keep that letter nearby?
Leslie: While I’ve had “passes” on other books, I only had one on this one and it’s a funny story. An agent e-mailed me on the same day about one hour after I got the offer from Dorchester to say that “the book wasn’t well-written, it was too snarky” and she vowed “it would never sell.” I really enjoyed that e-mail. It’s one of my favorite rejections. I’ll always keep it around. It just goes to show that it wasn’t the right book for her – she didn’t “get it” and therefore she wasn’t the right agent for me. Actually, it was after that incident that I decided to do a lot of research on agents. I found one that I wanted after several months of checking things out and it turned out she loved the book. I adore her and she’s the perfect professional to market me.
The Realm: On your path to publication, which came first, the agent or the editor? Can you tell us about the day you got the call?
Leslie: The editor came first in this case. I’d had some weird experiences with agents prior and really wanted to be serious about finding the right one. Actually, I met my editor, Leah, at the Spotlight on Dorchester session at the Romance Writers of America conference in Atlanta. A friend of mine, Cheryl Smith, dragged me up to pitch the editors at the end. I didn’t want to do that, but she made me. I had business cards describing the book, and I gave one to Leah when it was my turn in line. She laughed and told me to send her a partial.
I got home and overnighted the first three chapters and a synopsis. The NEXT day, right after she received it, she requested a full. I spent the next four days polishing frantically and sent it off. We left for a trip to L.A. the next day. When we got back, a week to date from when I sent it, I got the offer. Actually, it was a year ago today! I freaked out and my husband and kids and I all celebrated in the back yard with champagne (sparkling juice for the kids – I’m not that bad!) while I called everyone I know.
The Realm: What do you see for yourself next, either personally or career oriented? Do you have any projects in mind that are especially meaningful to you?
Leslie: Book #2, Guns Will Keep Us Together comes out in February and Missi’s book comes out in July. I’m planning to continue the series and actually have had a few requests for Grandma Maryland’s story. I believe the next story is Coney Island Bombay though. He’s a carny with a Ph.D. in philosophy from an ivy league school, so he intrigues me. In the back of my mind I’m toying with other ideas, but they’re too new to talk about yet.
The Realm: I’m eagerly waiting for Dak’s story GUNS WILL KEEP US TOGETHER. Can you tell us a little about it, how you came up with it, something to hold us over?
Leslie: Dak’s story was a lot of fun to write. He’s such an adorable little brat. And I really put him through the ringer in this one. You’ll see a lot of Gin and Liv; more of Carolina and Paris is in there constantly. Leah suggested I write it when she bought ‘SCUSE ME, and I was happy to do it. You can read an excerpt on my website www.leslielangtry.com.
Last edited by Naughty Nikki, 9/21/2007, 3:24 pm
--- Naughty Nikki Duncan
The sensuous side of suspense and magic.
www.nikkiduncan.com |
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9/5/2007, 6:54 pm
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Naughty Nikki
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Re: INTERVIEW WITH LESLIE LANGTRY, DEBUT AUTHOR, FUNNY LADY
Leslie also gave me an excerpt that isn't found on her website.
Excerpt from GUNS WILL KEEP US TOGETHER by Leslie Langtry
Usually, I sleep in. When you only have to kill one or two people a year, your hours are pretty flexible. I’d say ninety-nine percent of the time I do whatever I want and one percent is work. It’s a damn good ratio. I’m more of a night guy anyway.
Which is why I was pissed off hearing the phone ring at 8:00 the next morning. This time it was my grandmother.
“Hey, Grandma.” I used my most endearing voice, the one that made her treat me like a sovereign prince all these years. Yes, I’m a spoiled assassin.
“Dakota, dear. How are you?” Grandma Mary replied cheerfully. Normally I’d be nervous about this, but she’s been sucking up to me even more lately since she almost had me terminated six months ago. I don’t hold a grudge but I’d be an idiot not to milk it.
“Fine. What’s up?” I answered, turning my charm all the way up to eleven.
“Well, the Council has some work for you and Paris. Meet me at the Hyatt in one hour,” she ordered.
“The Hyatt? Here in town?” Grandma’s here? Let the spoiling begin! Last time she showed up she gave me a black American Express card with an unlimited line of credit and a private concierge available 24/7. I can’t wait to see what she has for me this time! What?
“One hour. I’m calling Paris now.” She hung up.
I jumped out of bed and raced to the shower. Okay, so I had to wait for the blonde in there to finish first. I shoved Jill . . . Jenny . . . Judy (or whatever her name was) out the door, even turning down her offer to spoil me in a different way.
Fifty minutes later, I knocked at the Presidential Suite door, a bouquet of flowers in my hand, ridiculously hyper in anticipation of a spectacular gift.
Paris opened the door. He laughed when he saw the lilies and ushered me in, showing the ones he’d brought. Grandma gave me a rough kiss and hug and invited us to sit down. I put on my most charming smile and awaited my prize.
“Boys, I called you here because I need your help. The Bombay Family business is in trouble.”
What? I blinked a few times. The Bombays were in trouble . . . again? And no present?
“Over the years,” she continued, ignoring the blatant look of disappointment in my face, “we’ve grown the business, utilizing the latest technology and intelligence. But that’s not working anymore.” Her tone changed. “You’d think quality and craftsmanship would be enough these days, but nooooo.”
I looked at Paris and he shrugged back at me, assumingly pissed about not getting a present too.
“Grandma, what the hell are you talking about?” I asked.
She frowned. “No doubt you thought I was in town to spoil you?”
I stumbled over my denial, “No, ha, ha, ha. Why would you think that?”
Maryland Bombay (have I mentioned that everyone in the family is named after a city, state or nation?) narrowed her eyes. Uh oh. It was a look she reserved for her victims. “It’s time for you two to put your talents to the test for the family. Dakota, with your education in marketing and Paris’ M.B.A. from Wharton, I expect great things from you.”
Uh oh. “Grandma,” I protested, “I’m not really a marketing consultant. That’s just my cover.”
Her eyes narrowed to slits. “Did we or did we not send you to Princeton to study marketing? Did you or did you not graduate ranked fifth in your class?”
I ran my fingers through my hair (maybe it wasn’t boyishly tousled enough to warrant a present). “Well, sure. But I’ve kind of been out of practice on that particular skill set. Now, if you want me to kill or seduce someone - that I can do.”
She shook her head. “Consider this one of the most important things you can do for the family.”
Paris sat there, nodding like a bobble-head dachshund, and I felt a little betrayed that he didn’t argue with her too.
I sighed. “When do you need us to start?”
“Now.” She smiled as she handed over two large black leather binders. “This is all the activity of the last five fiscals. You’ll find our annual reports in there too. I need you both to discover how we can better market our business.”
I flipped through the pages of pie charts, organizational flow charts, and statistics. Which is really weird when you consider that we kill people for money. Who knew the Council was so organized? I blame the European branch.
“We have annual reports?” I asked. Why do we have annual reports? Who in the hell would we file them with?
“So,” Paris interrupted, his eyes never leaving the binder on his lap, “you want branding, focus groups, the whole lot?”
How do you do focus groups for assassination? Find a cross-section of average citizens and ask them, “How do you feel about ice picks versus handguns in life termination?”
“Let me get this straight,” I piped up. “You want us to come up with logos and slogans and try them out on random people to find out which sells murder better?”
Grandma snapped, “Of course not! The public doesn’t know what we do! You’re to help the company find our target market!” Target market? Was she joking?
Paris winked at me, then rolled his eyes to Grandma, indicating he thought I was nuts. Bastard.
For a moment, I thought I might still be in bed, dreaming. I mean, come on! This isn’t the sort of business you create a marketing campaign for. That, and it would be a lot of work. I didn’t really have time. There were two new blondes at Gin’s spa I hadn’t gotten to yet.
Paris looked absorbed. Sure, he loved this stuff. Don’t get me wrong, he’s my wingman, but why would he take this seriously?
“Um, Grandma?” I hesitated, “Why would slogans and logos help us? Aren’t our main clients various government agencies? They don’t care about this crap. They just want results.” And unless I’m totally off base here, results means lifeless corpses - not a list of goals, objectives and action items.
Grandma leaned back with a sigh, “Well, we aren’t getting as much work as we used to.”
Paris spoke up (finally!), “So, the Council thinks a jazzed - up image will tell the CIA we are ready to take on more assignments?”
“Actually, boys, we just need to prove that like every other family business, we can adapt – change with progress.”
“Why don’t we just get out of the business entirely?” To be fair, this was a valid question. Our individual trust funds (from four millennia of wet work) exceeded $100 million dollars.
“Dammit, Dak!” Grandma sputtered, her face turning an alarming shade of mauve. “Get with the program! This is what Bombays do! It’s what we’ve always done! Why should we stop now when we’re the best in the business?”
Paris looked at me, then turned to her. “Maybe Dak is right, though.” I mentally made a note to cancel that body check I was going to give him in the hallway when we were done. “We’ve owned the assassination market for centuries. Why not quit while we’re ahead?”
I nodded in agreement, but it felt like I was in the movie Jackass and had just agreed to do something that would involve my testicles, jumper cables and a rusty WWII battery.
She shook her head. “Just because Gin has retired, doesn’t mean you can too. No. This is our family’s honor we’re talking about.” She stood, indicating that we should leave. “You have two weeks before you make your presentation to the Council. I’ll have Missi set up the multimedia equipment in the auditorium at Santa Muerta. I’ll expect at least Power Point 2007 for the presentation.” She herded us to the door and opened it. “That’s all. I want to see some real, outside-the -box thinking from you two.”
As the door shut on my stunned face, I couldn’t help wondering if the box she was referring to was my coffin.
--- Naughty Nikki Duncan
The sensuous side of suspense and magic.
www.nikkiduncan.com |
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9/21/2007, 3:28 pm
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McClure
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Re: INTERVIEW WITH LESLIE LANGTRY, DEBUT AUTHOR, FUNNY LADY
Leslie ~ Hi! Welcome to the Realm. :o) I was with Nikki while standing in that LONG line for Sherrilyn Kenyon at the Literacy Signing...and we spotted your book. I have to admit, that cover and title caught my eye like no other book had been able to do! That's about the time we stumbled over to you and gushed over your book. :o) It was the only book I purchased at the signing. I LOVED it. :o) That first chapter had me rolling! I have your refrigerator magnet...You can't pick your family, but you CAN pick them off...LOL! My MIL saw that. hee hee
I can't wait to read your next book...love the boxers. :o)
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9/23/2007, 8:44 am
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